Louis vs. Rick • Episode 6: Chag Sameach, Louis. Chag Sameach.

6: Chag Sameach, Louis. Chag Sameach.

11:13 AM

rick

what

so i was talking to mittens next door

I don't even want to know.

did you know theyre jewish

Yes, the Blums are Jewish.

wtf are the blums

The people next door, their last name is Blum.

mittens blum

I suppose so.

ok well im never gonna let that one die

but anyway

did you know if youre jewish you celebrate christmas for like two whole weeks

First of all it's called Hanukkah.

And it's like eight days or nights or something.

so its like three weeks god thats awesome

Sure, it's cool, that's just the Jewish winter holiday.

im gonna be jewish then

It's not that simple, Lou, it's a religion.

ok so can you do that for me

I don't know where to begin explaining how it doesn't work like that.

rick

i dont think youre listening to me

christmas rick

eight of them

mittens says hes gonna get something every day

Lou, it's not really like Christmas, I mean they give some gifts but it's not really the same. There's no tree, they just light some candles.

i dont like candles

See? You don't really know what it's all about, and I'm not going to help you become Jewish.

oh i get it

you dont want me to be one of the chosen

theres a name for people like you rick

Uh huh. You're being silly now, I'm done with this.

youre a putz

That's enough, Lou.

2:54 PM

rick

What

if you help me be jewish i will take back one thing i said about you for every day of christmas

It's called Hanukkah.

right that

so we have a deal

NO!

3:04 PM

rick

WHAT

what are you getting me for christmas

I don't know yet. I wouldn't tell you anyway.

can i make a suggestion

sure

i want one of those little hats our people wear

Lou, you are not Jewish, you can't just say you're Jewish, and I am not going to make that happen for you. So stop it.

rick i didnt want to play this card but i think you probably are aware that our people are extremely powerful and can make things difficult for you

Ok, let's suppose for a second you could become Jewish. What if I told you I'd only give you one gift anyway?

well isnt that like a goy

Now you're just being offensive. This is the end of this discussion, are we clear?

4:51 PM

I'm heading out soon, do we need anything for the weekend?

not that i can think of

do you have any plans

Emily is coming over tomorrow, and I'm hoping she'll hang out for the whole weekend so I want you to BE NICE THIS TIME.

being nice sounds like work rick

tomorrow is our peoples day of rest

I told you we were done with that. See you in a while.

5:04 PM

rick

...WHAT

oy vey

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